Ways to Support Your Child After School
Supporting your child after school is crucial in helping them decompress and regulate after a long and often demanding day. By creating a nurturing environment, you can help your child feel safe, supported, and emotionally secure. Here are some practical ways to support your child after school.
Be Mindful at School Pick-Up
Take a deep breath before collecting your child and prepare to meet their emotions with patience and understanding. Your calm presence will help them regulate their own feelings. Greet them warmly with a smile and a hug rather than bombarding them with questions about their day. Remember, they have spent the day answering questions and navigating social expectations—after school is the time for them to decompress.
On the way home, allow your child space to process their day. If they need silence, respect that. If they enjoy music, play something soothing in the car. For some children, pointing out small things in their environment—like birds in the trees or the colours in the sky—can be grounding. Every child is different, so take their lead and adjust your approach accordingly.
Have a Snack Ready
Hunger and fatigue can amplify emotions, making it harder for children to regulate. Offering a nutritious snack straight after school can help stabilise their energy levels. Crunchy foods can be particularly effective for neurodivergent children who seek sensory input, while protein-based snacks can help regulate blood sugar. Cold snacks, like fruit or a homemade ice lolly, can also be soothing.
Encourage Regulation on the Way Home
Providing an opportunity for movement can be beneficial. If possible, allow your child to scoot or walk part of the way home, or stop at a quiet park where they can run freely. A busy playground might be overwhelming, so choose spaces that help them regulate rather than overstimulate. If driving home, ensure they have access to a snack and a sensory kit with comforting items, such as fidget toys, headphones, or a soft blanket.
Water is highly regulating for the nervous system. If you live near a body of water, consider stopping to watch the ripples or skim stones—it can be a calming way for your child to reset before heading home.
Identify What Your Child Needs
Once home, observe your child’s cues to determine what they need. Some children benefit from quiet screen time, while others may prefer sensory play or one-on-one connection. Their needs may change daily, so be adaptable. Providing consistency while allowing for flexibility is key in helping them feel secure.
Comfortable Clothing and Sensory Tools
Encourage your child to change into comfy clothes when they get home. Sensory-friendly clothing, weighted blankets, or time in a sensory tent can help some children regulate more effectively.
Incorporate Water Play and Free Play
Play is a vital outlet for emotional processing. Outdoor play, especially with water, can be incredibly therapeutic. If the weather allows, set up a water table or let your child explore messy play in the garden. If outdoor play isn't an option, consider a long, relaxing bath before dinner. For neurodivergent children who find evening baths dysregulating, an after-school bath may be a great alternative, especially when combined with soothing Epsom salts to support relaxation.
Prioritise Connection
Small moments of connection can have a big impact. Whether it’s playing a game together, sharing a special meal, reading a story, or snuggling up for a TV show, these moments help children feel valued and secure.
In the mornings, try to spend a little extra time together before school. Filling up their emotional cup before separation can make transitions easier and help them feel more connected to you throughout the day.
Helping Children Release Their Feelings
Children often hold in their emotions throughout the school day. Creating opportunities to release these feelings can be beneficial. Instead of asking direct questions, use playful language, such as asking if they have any “tangles that need to be undone” or “squiggly feelings” that need to come out. Offer physical ways to release emotions, such as stomping, jumping on a trampoline, having a pillow fight, or wrestling with sofa cushions.
By being attuned to your child’s needs, creating a supportive routine, and offering them safe ways to decompress, you can help make the transition from school to home a much smoother experience for the whole family.